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about bekah by Robert 28 Jan 2005

Let me start by saying that Bekah is the perfect woman for me. Yep! That's for sure. What does that mean? Well, it doesn't mean that she's perfect – but, when God brings two individuals together in marriage, He doesn't do it so that they will complement each other in every possible way. There are areas in our life together where we grate against each other - bringing a refinement (or at least the chance for refinement) that will build a greater, more righteous character in each of us, resulting in an ultimate glorification of Him.

With that said, let me tell you just how awesome my wife and your friend is.

When I originally began penning the following, I thought my discussion would revolve around a couple thoughts about what I appreciate most about Bekah. But, the further I went, the more I realized that I have a LIST of what I appreciate most. So, let's take a look. Keep in mind – this is not a comprehensive list by any means.

What I admire most about my sweetheart is her:

compassion
determination
heart for seeking God
desire to continually communicate, and
love

(I find it quite interesting that some of my weakest points happen to be contained in the list of her strong points. I won't bore you with which ones.)

Compassion

Okay, so how do I come up with a list like this? Well, I live with her and get to see her "in action" on a daily basis. In action with our friends and family. In action with our pets. In action with telemarketers. And in action with our new baby. Her compassion and patience comes shining through, especially in dealing with Clarissa. When Daddy says, "Aw, set her down and let her cry it out...", Mommy says, "Come here sweet girl, let me comfort you."

When it comes to our indoor cat, Beebee (a.k.a. Tiffany, a.k.a. Baby), Bekah's compassion is ever-lasting. This is the kitty that Bekah grew up with. Since the wee age of 8, Bekah and Beebee have been inseperable (well, except for that time during college). Beebee is currently 18 years old, and Bek would want you to know that this equates to 116 human years. And when kitty hurdles come Beebee's way, Bekah provides the very best support that is possible. I know Beebee is fortunate to have Bekah as her keeper.

Pets aside, when it comes to dealing with people and their hurts and/or worries, Bekah is there for them. Not just physically next to them, but emotionally and spiritually by their side. And those "people" that first come to mind are her friends. It's a no-brainer that Bekah is there to talk and pray (and even be labor support for friends having babies) with those she loves at any time. But, where her compassionet heart really shines is with those "on the street," or in other words, with the poor and needy. I remember the first time I was in Chicago with her, while we were dating. We were about to go explore downtown, and her mom had this small, foam pad that she no longer wanted; the pad was just large enough to sleep on. Well, Bekah wanted to take it with us. "Hmm... okay," I said, not sure what to think. Eventually that evening, we ended up talking with a homeless fellow who, the best I can remember, knew of some people that could really use the foam pad. Wow! Up to that point, I had never had a conversation with someone who was homeless. And to provide for a need, as small as it may have been, was humbling; humbling for the reason that all I could think of up to that encounter was, "Let's get back to her mom's... it's freezing out here."

And let's not forget Bekah's time in New York city with Campus Crusade for Christ - reaching out and praying with those in need. I would have loved to see her on the streets of the Big Apple, simultaneously exercising every gift that she has been blessed with from above.

Determination

Around the house and in our neighborhood, it's evident that Bekah is a determined woman. Let me take the liberty to provide another list.

Bekah is determined:

to be a great wife
to be a great mother
to be a "real" and available friend
to minister to others
to communicate well and foster a loving family
to seek God and His desires
to be more organized

She is a visionary, and is determined to be the best that she can be. Sometimes this can lead to frustration – trying to accomplish these many goals on a daily basis. But I love her BIG ideas and I will even admit that I'm motivated by her sometimes tight, yet creative timelines.

Seeking God

Her heart after God is a great glory to Him! It goes without saying that I admire Bekah for the way she seeks after Him and spends time in His Word and in prayer. I have much to learn from her in this area.

And let me paint a small picture for you: Bekah feeding and rocking Clarissa; Beebee jumps up in her lap to join in the fun. So, in her arms – Clarissa. On one leg – Beebee. On the other leg – the Bible wide open (to Job). What a woman, and what a mom! Bekah spends more time in Bible studies with other women than anyone I know. Now, this doesn't necessarily mean a heart for God is there. But, the fruit doesn't lie. And when I see patience and gentleness and kindness in her everyday life, I know she loves and is seeking the Lord.

Communication

Words of Affirmation is Bekah's primary love language – and communication is key for her to feel and experience love. The more that she communicates with those around her, the more confident she is in those relationships. And a key to our strong relationship and marriage is a continual effort to keep communicating; to keep talking about it. And in part, "communication" is why we have decided to tell you about ourselves in this way. I am, in effect, communicating to Bekah my thoughts about her.

And it's funny how I've been stretched to show her love through communication. My strong suit is service. I could do a million things for Bekah that I feel communicate love. But I could have spared myself a lot of wear and tear if I had chosen to send her a sweet card. I've come to understand that 20 hours of work could easily be replaced by or equate to one love note. (ha-ha) Now, if I could just get my body to fall in line with what my mind knows...

If you've ever received a card from Bekah – you know what I'm talking about. If you were to lay a card she had sent beside a card that I had sent (yeah, right – maybe that's your first clue), it would be quite apparent how much she loves and appreciates words.

The way that she communicates is an awesome gift, and I know that we all are blessed by it.

Love

So now, I've saved the best for last. And not only the best, but the most difficult to formulate words for. When I think about it, Bekah's compassion, determination and heart for God are all delicately wrapped up in her love. But there's more to it, much more. Something so wide and vast that I can hardly put a finger on it. Even when frustrated with each other – I sense my love for her, and know her love for me remains. It goes deep. Actually, deeper than ourselves and our marriage. And is firm – rooted in the One Foundation. But, how do I explain this? Maybe I won't. Maybe you can only experience it for yourself. Or maybe you can see it in what I've told you above. Either way, let me do this: I'm inviting you over for dinner. Just call us and tell us when you can come. And when you're here, you'll attest to what I'm telling you about Bekah, and you'll see this love – the love of God, through her.

One Other Thing

One thing that I left off the list – and you probably could care less about – is how gorgeous my wife is! Oh, and she's the only girl that can really make me laugh!

I love her... and I hope and pray to love her more. Bekah is a great wife; a great friend; and a great mother.